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嘿，姐妹们。
Hey, lady gang.
提醒一下，我们网站正在进行年终大促。
I'm just reminding you that we're having an ep and year end sale on our website.
商品折扣高达80%。
Things are up to 80% off.
音乐节上售罄的Lady World周边已经补货上架了。
There's some lady world merch that was sold out at the festival that we restocked for you.
连帽衫新增了三款新设计，包括你们一直想要的经典款。
There are three new versions of the crewneck sweater, including a classic, which you guys asked for.
可以访问theladygang.com或直接shop.theladygang.com下单，我们的精灵们正加班加点确保圣诞前送达。
You can head on over to theladygang.com or shop theladygang.com, and our elves are working hard to get you these by Christmas.
呃，这是什么情况？
Well, what is this?
欢迎加入姐妹帮。
Welcome to the lady gang.
太棒了。
That's amazing.
再说一遍。
Say that again.
女士帮派。
The lady gang.
这里的情况即将发生变化。
Things are about to change around here.
每周我们都会与好莱坞最热辣的女子团体——凯尔蒂·奈特、贝卡·托宾和杰克·瓦尼克相聚。
Each week, we catch up with Hollywood's hottest girl posse, Kelty Knight, Becca Tobin, and Jack Vanik.
你好。
Hello.
你好。
Hello.
你好。
Hello.
欢迎来到Lady Gang，我是Bektobin，与Jack Vanik和Kelty Knight一起在这里。
Welcome to lady I am Bektobin here with Jack Vanik and Kelty Knight.
你好。
Hello.
我最喜欢的事情
My favorite thing
Lady Gang最棒的时刻就是当我们聚在一起做最后的准备工作时，你知道的，我们在这里进行最后的确认。
of Lady Gang is when we get on and we're doing like our little last looks and, you know, we do last looks here at Lady Gang.
但就像我们在调试设备什么的，然后我们有一大堆八卦要聊，不得不先花十分钟聊个痛快，然后才说'节目上再聊'。
But like we're figuring out the tech or whatever, and then we have so much gossip that we're just we gotta like ten do ten minutes of full gossip, and then we're like, we'll talk about it on the show.
今天你们将听到的就是这样的节目，Lady Gang，这是我最爱的。
Here where you're getting one of those shows today, Lady Gang, which is my favorite.
八卦正在爆料中。
The tea is being spilled.
好的。
Okay.
是时候了
It's time for
美好的一周
Good week.
是的
Yes.
确实如此
It is.
糟糕的一周。
Bad week.
哦，不。
Oh, no.
我这周的好消息是寄出了所有快乐时光邮件俱乐部的订单，对此我超级开心。
My good week is I shipped out all of my mail club orders, my happy hour mail club orders, and I am just so happy about it.
我看到你家里开了个血汗工厂，有你父母和贾里德在干活？
Did you have the I saw you had the sweat shop in your house with your parents and Jared.
是啊。
Yeah.
我所有的无偿工人都在这儿，包括我父母和贾里德，我们发出了638份订单。
I had all of my unpaid workers with me, my parents and Jared, and we shipped out six thirty eight orders.
哇。
Wow.
我知道这太疯狂了。
I know it was crazy.
我真是太兴奋了。
I'm just so excited.
我简直是把它推出去了。
I launched it literally.
就像我们推出女士盒子的方式一样。
It was like how we launched the lady box.
就像是凭空想出的。
It was like, here's an idea made out of air.
我什么都没展示给你看。
I'm showing you nothing.
我只是在向你兜售希望和梦想。
I'm selling you on a hope and a dream.
我真的很兴奋有这么多人接受了我的想法，并相信我所做的事情。
And I'm just so excited that so many people gave in to my idea and believed in what I was doing.
我对此感到非常兴奋。
I'm so excited about it.
我就是很喜欢做这件事的乐趣。
I just like to have so much fun doing it.
这压力很大，因为事情永无止境——现在我刚发完货，就得开始计划下个月的事，还要订购下个月的物资。
And it's very stressful because it never ends because now once I ship it out, now I have to plan the next month and I have to order the stuff for the next month.
这种压力几乎不间断，但很酷的是我可以做任何想做的事。
And it's just kind of nonstop stress, but it's just cool because I get to do anything that I want.
我给每位订阅者写了一封非常用心的信，这真的很有趣。
I wrote like a really pretty letter to everybody that signed up, and it's just really fun.
这就像是我新的小小激情项目。
And it's like my new little passion project.
就像老派的Substack。
It's like an old school Substack.
是啊。
Yeah.
嗯，某种程度上来说
Well, it is kind of
很酷，因为我能锻炼我的写作能力。
cool because I get to flex my writing muscle.
没错。
Yes.
说到Substack，我喜欢人们愿意付费阅读他人作品这一点，这就像过去人们订阅出版物那样。
Well, Substack, I love the fact that people will pay to read people's writing because it's like people used to back in the day with publications and stuff.
所以我认为这是支持作家的一种很酷的方式。
So I think it's really a cool way to support writers.
但我觉得光有Substack还不够，我得提供更多东西。
But I feel like I'd have to give something more than just having a substack.
所以这有点像迷你Substack，还附带许多其他小礼物。
So it's kind of like a mini substack with lots of other little presents.
我想我要把杰克·朱迪思改名了。
I think that I'm renaming Jack Judith.
而朱迪思实际上是个83岁的老太太。
And Judith is actually like an 83 year old woman.
嗯。
Mhmm.
我
I
我就想说句话。
I just wanna say something.
《Lady Gang》已经十年了。
Been ten years of Lady Gang.
当时我随机给杰克打电话时还说，这个超酷的女孩，我们需要她。
And when I was like randomly calling Jack being like, oh, this super cool girl, like, we need her.
她真的很酷。
She's really cool.
经历了杰克的所有阶段——裸体裤、比基尼、防风衣、在Lady Gang TV上不穿胸衣，所有这些酷女孩的玩意儿后，杰克已经变回了朱迪斯。
And through all the levels of Jack, the naked pants, the bikinis, the windbreakers, the no bra on Lady Gang TV, like all the cool girl shit, Jack has reverted into Judith.
她买了房子后就变成了朱迪斯。
She bought a house and she became Judith.
朱迪斯正在给我们看这些圣诞装饰品，杰克在Instagram上收集的这些饰品像是苏格兰小麦镇制造的。
Judith is showing us these Christmas ornaments that Jack is collecting on her Instagram are like they are made in the wheat town of Scotland.
它们有点像是从古老的
And they are like a little from the old
地精那里来的。
gnomes.
它们是地精。
They are gnomes.
这些是你祖母从她祖母那里传下来的东西，而她现在却买新的。
They are the things that your grandmother handed down from her grandmother, and she's buying them new.
她收集这些，对房子的装饰兴奋不已，还手写信件。
She's collect she's so excited about her house decorations, her writing a handwritten letter.
朱迪丝，欢迎加入女士帮。
Judith, welcome to the lady gang.
是啊。
Yeah.
我确实有两面性。
I really have like two sides to me.
我既有放荡的一面，也有祖母般的一面，中间没有任何过渡。
I have like the slut and the grandma, and there's no one between.
确实如此。
It's true.
杰瑞德叫我老奶奶，因为太阳下山后，比如冬天四点左右，我就换上睡衣了。
Jared calls me the grandma because after the sun goes down, like in the wintertime, it's like four and I'm like, I'm in pajamas.
我什么都没做。
I'm doing nothing.
我正窝在沙发上做手工，这就是我的日常状态。
I'm getting cozy on the couch and doing a craft, and that's just kind of where I live.
但另一方面我也会疯狂派对。
But then I will also party my face off.
所以我总是活在两个极端里，懂吗？
So it's like there I live in the extremes, you know?
嗯哼。
Mhmm.
这样很好。
It's good.
这是一种平衡。
It's a balance.
明白吗？
You know?
努力工作，尽情玩乐。
Work hard, play hard.
没错。
Exactly.
我我想向你提个想法。
I I would like to just pitch an idea to you.
福特其实很喜欢去邮箱取我们的邮件。
Ford actually loves going to the mailbox and getting our mail.
偶尔里面会有一些东西，我可以假装是寄给他的，因为上面有车之类的图案。
And every once in a while, there's something in there that I can, like, pretend was sent to him because it has, like, a car on it.
或者，有一天我们收到了迪士尼的东西，我就说，天哪，你收到米奇邮件了。
Or, you know, some one day we got, like, something from Disney and I was like, oh my gosh, you got Mickey mail.
结果我制造了这个大麻烦，现在他想要属于自己的邮件。
So then I created this whole monster and now he like wants mail for himself.
如果你想合作，我们可以成立一个儿童邮件俱乐部，我觉得他们会非常喜欢这个主意。
So if you want to collaborate, we could do a kid's male club because I think that they would get a real kick out of it.
说实话，这是个很棒的主意。
I honestly a great idea.
是啊。
Yeah.
这真是个绝妙的主意。
It's a really good idea.
我会告诉
I'll tell
你原因。
you why.
因为凯尔蒂阿姨，我在家族事务上没什么才能，但这件事我确实一直为所有侄女侄子们做着。
Because auntie Kelty, I have no skills with family, but this is something I've been doing forever for all of my nieces and nephews.
而且我对侄女侄子的定义非常宽泛。
And I use niece and nephew very largely.
比如，全世界大概有15个这样的孩子，都是我朋友们的子女。
Like, there's, like, 15 of them all around the world, like all my friends' kids.
我旅行时真的会在护照夹里随身携带国际邮票和普通邮票。
And I literally carry international and regular stamps in my passport holder when I travel.
每到一个地方，我都会买大约15张明信片寄出去。
And everywhere I go, I buy like 15 postcards and I send them.
我寄过，孩子们真的很喜欢收到邮件。
I've sent and like, kids love to get the mail.
我觉得你说得非常对，他们会有特别的感受。
They feel so I think you're really right.
我们要做吗，杰克？
Should we do it, Jack?
其实已经有几个人向我提过这个建议了。
I've actually had a couple of people ask me to do that.
他们说做个儿童版会特别酷。
They're like, a kid's version would be so cool.
我们开始做吧。
Let's do it.
然后制作
And make
让它超级便宜。
it like super inexpensive.
这样每隔一两周就会收到不同主题的东西。
So it's like just something is coming every week or two weeks and they could would have different themes.
就像是给孩子的Bark Box（宠物订阅盒）。
It's like a bark box for children.
不是盒子。
Not a box.
谁在做这项工作？
Is doing who is doing this work?
因为我没有...
Because I'll I don't have the
我来负责运输，我来做运输的苦力活。
do the I will do the ship I will do the shipping sweatshop.
好的。
Okay.
我会每月向你推销这些创意。
And I will pitch to you the ideas for every month.
所以我想从你这里需要的只是执行部分，让它看起来可爱。
So I think all I need from you is like the execution to make it cute.
设计部分。
The design.
好的。
Okay.
我可以进行这类合作。
I could I could do this kind of collaboration.
我们可以按年龄组和性别来划分。
We could do like an age group and a gender.
这样就能做成类似，你知道的，福特喜欢汽车之类的东西。
So it could be like, you know, Ford loves cars and all the things.
还可以加入一些类似涂色本的页面，让他们可以，你知道的，就像我喜欢的那种。
And there could be like a little like coloring book page where they can like, you know That's what I've like that.
有一点
Have a little
涂色本，这主意太聪明了。
coloring book and That's so smart.
你们真是太聪明了。
You guys are so smart.
呃。
Ugh.
是啊。
Yeah.
我都等不及不用做这些工作了。
I can't wait to not do any of that work.
好好享受吧。
Enjoy.
会好的
It's gonna
会很棒。
be great.
好的。
Okay.
你糟糕的等待是什么
What's your bad wait.
抱歉。
Sorry.
还有，祝你一周愉快。
Also, good week.
能更新一下你的血液情况吗？
Can we get an update on your blood?
你感觉好吗？
Do you feel good?
哦，我不太确定。
Oh, I don't know.
我是说，我上次输液是在大约五天前。
I mean, I got my last infusion, like, five days ago.
我觉得这可能需要一点时间才能见效。
I think it's supposed to take a little bit of time.
三周左右吧。
Three weeks.
我也不清楚。
I don't know.
嗯。
Yeah.
你别
Don't do you
有
have a
现在晒黑了吗？
tan right now?
因为你脸色看起来更有血色了。
Because you have more color in your face.
不，我没有。
No, I don't.
我想可能只是因为我正对着暖色调的环形灯，因为我刚才照镜子时心想，天啊，你的脸色简直苍白得要命。
I think it just might be I'm on the warm ring light right now because I just looked at my face in the mirror and I was like, goddamn, you are pasty as hell.
你需要喷个美黑。
You need a spray tan.
是啊。
Yeah.
我不知道。
I don't know.
输液后我没有感到不适，这挺好的。
I didn't feel bad from the infusions, which is good.
没有，因为我见过有人因此完全精疲力尽。
Didn't because I've seen people be totally wiped out from it.
不过我们走着瞧吧。
But we'll see.
我出现的一个主要症状是严重的心悸，尤其是到高海拔地区时。
A big symptom that I was having is I have terrible heart palpitations, especially when I go into altitude.
所以新年我要去大熊湖。
So I'm going to Big Bear for New Year.
我很想看看这些症状是否会消失，因为那是严重缺铁的表现。
I'm interested to see if they go away because that's a huge low iron.
朱迪斯奶奶要去大熊湖了。
Grandma Judith heading on to Big Bear.
她会在火炉边织毛衣，做些袜子，然后从别人胸前喝烈性威士忌。
She's going to knit by the fire and, you know, make some shocks, and then she's gonna hardball whiskey from someone else's tit.
好吧。
Okay.
我糟糕的一周是和Jared一起完成了我们一年一度的JCPenney拍摄，和往常一样，这次也棒极了。
So my bad week is Jared and I did our annual JCPenney photo shoot, which was incredible, like always.
我就这么直接预约了。
And I kind of just booked it.
我当时想，我们之前做过这个。
I was like, we've done this before.
我懂规矩。
I know the deal.
我们去拍照。
We go to take the pictures.
首先，他们只给了我们十分钟。
Number one, they only gave us ten minutes.
我当时就觉得，我记得这个时间应该更长些。
And I'm like, I remember this being longer.
我记得整个拍摄过程应该不止十分钟。
I remember getting a little bit longer than ten minutes for a whole entire photo shoot.
但我们还是去了，拍了照片，随便吧。
But we get in there, we get the pictures, whatever.
然后我们去付款，JCPenney店里的那位女士一直在推销附加产品。
And then we go to pay and the lady at the JCPenney place, they're upselling you.
她们会说：买这个套餐，送你一张可以挂在墙上的海报。
They're like, buy this package, get this poster for your wall.
你要马克杯吗？
Do you want mugs?
你要鼠标垫吗？
Do you want mouse pads?
诸如此类的东西。
Whatever.
所以她一直在向我推销这个套餐，说：哦，这个套餐包含几张照片，只要4.85美元。
So she's like selling me on this package and she's like, oh, there's like a package of a couple of pictures and that one's $4.85.
我当时就：
And I was like,
485美元。
$485.
她问，是JCPenney还是类似JC的店？
She's like, JCPenney or is it like a JC?
哦，不，是JC。
Oh, no, it's JC.
确实是。
It is.
我没
I didn't
想到他们还在营业。
know they were still in business.
通货膨胀啊，老兄。
Inflation, man.
Penny。
Penny.
我是说，离我们最近的一家店大概要35分钟车程。
I mean, there's like the closest one to us is like thirty five minutes away.
我们本地的商场以前是有一家的。
They used to have one at our local mall.
但我当时就说，485美元？然后我就拒绝了。
But I was like, excuse $485 And then I was like, no.
我记得去年我们收到一个包裹，整个包裹才2.5美元，管他呢。
And I'm like, I definitely remember last year we got a package and the whole entire package was like $2.50, but whatever.
所以我就说，好吧，我们只要电子照片。
So I was like, okay, we'll just take the digital pictures.
这才是我真正想要的。
That's all I really want.
然后她说，好的，拍摄费用是230美元，每多一个人入镜还要再加30美元。
And she's like, okay, well, basically to have the photo shoot is $230 and then for every person in the photoshoot is another $30.
所以根本没法讨价还价，如果你家有五口人，光是站在那里就要多收150美元。
So you can't even go like, they're charging if you have a family of five, that is a 150 extra dollars just for being there.
总之，JCPenney的摄影套餐价格涨得离谱。
So anyways, JCPenney photoshoot inflation is out of control.
最后我花了300美元才拿到8张照片。
I ended up paying $300 for eight pictures.
而且你还得跟他们讨价还价，然后穿着那套蠢得要命的服装。
Also, like and then you had to, like, weasel them about the money, and then you're in that stupid ass costume.
我知道。
I know.
哦，
Oh,
我爱你。
I love you.
但你可以
But you can
雇佣自由摄影师来
a wear freelance photographer for
这正是我所说的意思。
That's to round exactly what I said.
你可以
You could
AI那个
AI that
照片。
photo.
我当时就想，这简直是
I was like, this is
从现在开始就用AI处理。
AI it from now on.
我会的。
I will.
因为我当时就觉得，这太离谱了。
Because I'm like, this is insane.
而且那里挤满了人。
And it was packed.
挤满了大家庭。
Packed with big families.
我当时就想，这对你们来说可是十分钟就花掉一千美元的活动啊
I was like, this is a thousand dollar ten minute outing for you You
你们应该在橙县也开一家。
guys should set one up in Orange County.
是的。
Yes.
嗯，他们确实有那些拍照服务，但你知道的，就像我们所有商品照片都是我拍的那样？
Well, they do have those, like, photo, but you know when, like, we have all of our merch pics that I take?
对。
Yeah.
他们有个类似自拍肖像工作室的地方，会给你个小遥控器，但设备都是专业的，包括相机和灯光。
They have like, so it's like a self portrait photo studio that they give you a little clicker, but it's all professional and the camera and the lighting.
我当时就想，我需要一个带背景的那种。
And I'm like, I need one of those with background.
因为我觉得，我们只需要做到那样就够了。
Because I'm like, that's all we needed to do.
比如我本可以自己拍照，效果会好得多，因为那个家伙...但关键是整个流程的问题
Like, I could have taken the photos, and they would have been way better because the guy But it was the whole thing about
这完全就是JCPenney的风格。
It's a whole JCPenney.
它带着那种，嗯，有点模糊的感觉，就是那种氛围。
It's got that, like, oh, a little bit of that smudgy on it, and you're just like, it's the vibe.
要我说，JCPenney啊，你们搞砸了。
Like, well, you JC Penny, you blew it.
你们本可以成为爆款的。
You could have been viral.
如果你们也像我们做圣诞礼盒那家店一样，提供100美元20分钟的服务
If you were offering these for a $100 for twenty minutes like that guy that we did the Christmas box at
我知道汤姆的一小时快照。
I know Tom's one hour photo.
汤姆的一小时快照。
Tom's one hour photo.
你本可以走红网络，排队的人能排上好几天。
You could be viral and you could have lines for days.
但他们确实每天都排长队。
But they do have lines for days.
这太疯狂了。
That's the craziest thing.
完全被大家庭预订满了。
It was completely booked out with huge families.
我当时就想，这也太离谱了。
I'm like, this is nuts.
简直疯狂。
It was insane.
总之，我得看看上次的收据，因为价格竟然翻了三倍，杰西潘尼让我震惊。
Anyway, I need to look at my receipt from last time because I was like, that price has tripled and I am blown away at JCPenney.
啧啧。
Like, tsk tsk.
太糟糕了。
Terrible.
丽贝卡。
Rebecca.
好的。
Okay.
那么我的好消息是，我已经正式计划好了我的四十岁生日。
So my good week is that I have officially planned my fortieth birthday.
我告诉过你们我已经做好计划了吗？
Did I tell you guys that I had made the plan?
没有。
No.
不这么认为。
Don't think so.
我不这么认为。
I don't think so.
我们上次交谈时，你说你不知道该做什么，很困惑，想做点什么但又无从下手。
The last time we spoke, you said you didn't know what to do and you were confused and you wanna do something, but nothing.
是啊。
And yeah.
是啊。
Yeah.
所以我决定和Zach去纽约度周末，因为我觉得...我在想我们可以去些不太远的地方，毕竟只有周末时间。
So I've just decided that I'm gonna go to New York with Zach for the weekend because I feel like you know, I was thinking about places that we could go that weren't too far away because it's only the weekend.
在国内真的没有其他城市能让我感觉如此充满活力和能量。
And there's really no other, like, city in the country that I feel as good and energized in.
而且我不想做水疗那些事。
And I don't wanna do the spa thing.
在我平常的生日里，我通常会去水疗中心待一天，但那种氛围，怎么说呢，非常低迷。
On my normal birthdays, I'll usually go to the spa for the day, but that's, like, very low vibes.
你懂吗？
You know?
能量很低。
Low vibrations.
绝对是低能量状态。
Definitely low vibrations.
所以这就是我的计划。
So that's what I'm doing.
我很期待。
And I'm excited.
而且扎克负责制定所有计划，因为我拒绝操心这些。
And Zach's making all the plans because I refuse to.
不错。
Nice.
希望这是个正确的选择。
And I'm just it was the right choice, hopefully.
敬请期待。
Stay tuned.
但我觉得这是对的
But I it feels like the I right
我喜欢这样。
love that.
你们打算怎么安排？氛围会是怎样的？
Are you guys gonna, like what's the vibe?
你们会出去到处逛逛吗？
Are you gonna be, like, out and about?
你们会去看演出然后吃晚餐吗？
Are you gonna be, like, a show and a dinner?
不过好在的是，我最近刚去过纽约，所以已经看了《棋局》，这就是我觉得下次去纽约时想做的事——不是必须做，而是想做的事。
Well, the good thing is I was recently in New York, so I was able to like see chess and I was able and that's like the one thing that I felt like I like I needed to do not needed to do, wanted to do next time I was in New York.
那原本是我生日那个周末。
So it was gonna be the weekend of my birthday.
但由于我提前去了，所以算是完成了心愿。
But then because I ended up going early, I like checked the box.
我已经看过了。
I got to see it.
而且扎克并不是个喜欢音乐剧的人。
And also like Zach is not a musical person.
所以即便是我生日，我也不想让他一个周末连看两场音乐剧。
So I even though it is my birthday, I wouldn't wanna like put him through two musicals in one weekend type of thing.
对。
Yeah.
我们将主要在市中心购物、享用美味晚餐，自由、有趣又浪漫。
So it's gonna be more of a downtown shopping, really good dinners, just, like, free and fun and flirty.
地狱
Hell
是啊。
yeah.
自由、有趣、风情的四十岁。
Free fun, flirty forties.
没错。
Yes.
你知道吗？
And you know what?
这对你来说太完美了，贝卡，不是要给你当人生导师什么的，但这本质上就是你啊，你骨子里有很大一部分就是那个女孩，那个纽约客。
This is perfect for you, Becca, because not to success coach you or anything, but like, you this is at your core, there's such a big piece of you that is that girl, that is like that New Yorker.
现在正是庆祝它的好时机。
And it's a perfect time to celebrate that.
放下你的宝贝，放下亚特兰大，放下洛杉矶，贝卡，回到过去，喝杯咖啡，手牵手在中央公园散步，感受这座城市的能量，就像庆祝事实一样。
Leave your baby, leave Atlanta, leave the LA, Becca, revert back to get a coffee and walk hand in hand around Central Park, and just like be around the energy of the city, and like celebrate the fact of like, where you started and where you've come from.
就像，这太疯狂了。
Like, it's a Crazy.
美好的旅程。
Beautiful journey.
有道理。
Makes sense.
我很喜欢。
I love it.
我觉得太完美了。
I think that's perfect.
是啊。
Yeah.
还有那些服装，现在是冬天，你可以叠穿，这是你最喜欢的。
And the outfits, and it's like winter, so you can like layer, which is like your favorite.
没错。
Yep.
希望天气不会太糟糕。
I hope it doesn't I hope it's not like gross weather.
希望天气只是寒冷干燥。
I hope it's just like cold and dry.
是啊。
Yeah.
寒冷干燥的层次感。
Cold, dry layers.
我确实需要买一件新的大衣，要非常时髦的那种，因为我感觉我的衣橱里已经找不到这种款式了。
I do need to buy a new really chic coat because I feel like I don't have that anymore in my repertoire.
住在德克萨斯然后是洛杉矶，我从来就没穿过大衣。
Live in Texas and then LA, I never wore them.
所以这可能是我到那儿后要做的第一件事，你懂吧？
So maybe that'll be like on the list of like the first thing I do when I get there, you know?
然后我就可以把这当作我四十岁的生日礼物——你的四十岁。
And then I can like always think of that as like my fortieth birthday Your fortieth.
对。
Yeah.
嗯
Mhmm.
他们有，我是说，
They have a I mean,
你可能想要更高级的，但我上次去的时候，第五大道的那家芒果店会让你大开眼界。
you probably want something nicer, but when I was just there, the mango on 5th Avenue will fuck you up.
明白吗？
Okay?
我在那儿的时候就是没法在第五大道购物。
I just can't shop on 5th Avenue when I'm there.
太混乱了。
It's chaos.
哦，不是那家芒果店...我是说，确实很混乱，但那是芒果店。
Oh, not at the the mango was I mean, it's chaos, but, like, it was mango.
他们东西不错。
They have good stuff.
确实喜欢芒果。
Do love mango.
你知道谁家有芒果吗？
I love you know who has mango?
梅西百货。
Macy's.
梅西百货有，对。
Macy's has yeah.
每当我需要买些东西，比如婴儿派对用品之类的。
I anytime I need something for, like, a baby shower or god.
我参加了太多婴儿派对。
I go to so many baby showers.
比如一顿精致的晚餐，或者刚好适合那种高级、剪裁得体的基本款场合。
Like, a dinner, a chic dinner or, like, it just fits that, like, elevated, tailored basics type thing.
就像是更高档版的Zara。
Is like it's like more elevated Zara.
展开剩余字幕（还有 480 条）
是啊。
Yeah.
没错。
Yes.
而且不是每个人都能拥有它。
And not everybody's gonna have it.
所以我其实觉得，梅西百货可能有他们自己独特的芒果产品。
And so and I actually think that, like, Macy's gets their own mango specialty.
比如独家款。
Like exclusives.
根据我的了解，他们确实有。
I think they do from what I've gathered.
总之，是的。
Anyways, yeah.
芒果很棒。
Mango's great.
为你即将在纽约的生活感到兴奋。
Excited for you in New York.
谢谢。
Thanks.
是啊。
Yeah.
那会很棒的。
That'll be great.
很兴奋。
Excited.
好的。
Okay.
我糟糕的一周在于我无法理解这个世界。
My bad week is that I do not understand the world.
我们现在到哪儿了，伙计们？
Where where are we guys?
不。
No.
Instagram上到底有没有一个设置能让你的通知关闭？
How on earth do does is there a setting on Instagram that your notifications are turned off?
你有没有在私信里见过，当你发消息给别人时，会显示某某已开启通知静音？
Have you seen on DMs with people, you'll DM them, and it'll be like, so and so has their notifications silenced?
嗯。
Yeah.
为什么？
Why?
Instagram还是
Instagram or
整个Instagram。
across Instagram.
你的整个
Your whole
就像静音那种，你知道，就是短信没声音的状态？
It's like a silent like, you know, when your texts are silent?
我觉得我没有设置过，别人私信时我收不到通知。
I don't think I have my like, I don't get a notification when someone DMs.
嗯，你的设置可能不一样。
Well, your settings are probably different.
比如当你有很多粉丝时，你肯定不想每次有人私信都听到提示音
Like, when you have a lot of followers, you don't wanna have a no you don't wanna get a ding every time someone DM's
你
you.
但是
But
即便如此，即便你只有10个粉丝，我们到底为什么要开Instagram通知？
even still even still, if you have 10 followers, like, why on earth are we turning on notifications for Instagram?
哦，就是说这个功能为什么存在？
Oh, like, why would they even exist in the first place?
它们为什么存在？
Why would they exist?
第二，你为什么觉得有必要？
And number two, why would you feel the need?
直接在手机上关掉通知就行。
Just turn them off on your phone.
我不太理解这个。
Like, I don't understand this.
所有这些通知都被我静音了。
Like, so I all these things are silenced.
这是为谁设计的？
Who is that for?
是不是因为当我给朋友Megan发搞笑名字时——虽然她的通知没静音——但我发现她的通知是静音的。
Is it because when I send a funny name to my friend, Megan, not that hers are silenced, but like, I'm like, oh, she has them her notification's silent.
这样我就不会因为她没立即回复而觉得被冒犯。
So I won't be offended that she doesn't get back to me immediately.
我们为何而为何？
Why are we why?
我们不是在为你消音，贝卡。
We're not silencing things for you, Becca.
我们是为了自己才消音的，因为我在录播客时需要避免叮咚声干扰。
We're silencing them for us because when I'm podcasting, I need to not have dings.
但你为什么还要开着通知呢？
But why are you having your notifications on at all?
噢，是为了告诉别人她收不到通知。
Oh, to tell people She doesn't get the notifications.
就像，为什么我们要...不过这也算双赢。
Like, why do we have but also, it's like a double win.
比如，是不是该直接让通知通过？
Like, should just have go them?
通知要么通过要么不通过。
It should just go or not go.
你他妈的根本不在乎。
You don't fucking care.
就应该这样。
It should just yeah.
这对我来说太奇怪了。
And it's just so it's so weird to me.
我就想，为什么我们每次不能立即回复别人时都要加这么多免责声明？
I'm like, why do we have to have all of these, like, disclaimers every time we can't get back to somebody right away?
直接默认我不会立刻回复你就行了。
Just assume that I'm not getting back to you right away.
这就引出了我的第二个观点。
And that brings me to my second point.
我已经拒绝了。
I have refused.
我开始拒绝在私信里回复我真正认识的人。
I've started to refuse to respond to people I actually know on DM.
我从不回复任何人的私信。
I never respond to anybody on DMs.
任何人都不回。
Anybody ever.
我再也不这么做了。
I'm not doing it anymore.
我现在甚至都不点开看了。
I just it's like I'm not even opening them anymore.
我的整个商业模式就是建立在私信关系上的。
My whole business model is this DM relationship.
你不认识的人？
People you don't know?
不认识的和认识的人都有。
People I don't know and people I do know.
比如，我们现在都不交换电话号码了。
Like, we don't exchange phone numbers anymore.
但是，但是，就是，
But but but, like,
昨晚的派对，我当时就想，我会在Instagram上私信你。
you're party last night, and I was like, I'll DM you.
因为在Instagram上找人并直接私信比交换电话号码之类的要方便多了
Because it's so much easier to find someone and just DM them on Instagram than it is to, like, exchange phone numbers and blah
诸如此类的。
blah blah.
没那么正式。
Less formal.
这感觉挺正式的。
It's like formal.
并不是说我不想成为真正的朋友。
It's not like I don't wanna be a real friend.
你懂我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
除非是真朋友，否则我根本不想和人交流。
I don't wanna communicate with people at all unless we're real friends.
这就是你我之间的区别。
That is the difference between you and I.
这就是，这就是
That is that is
区别在于在派对上遇到你时，除非我们真的合得来且会成为真正的朋友，否则我不想交换联系方式。
the difference meet you at a party and I don't want to exchange information unless we've really like hit it off and we're gonna be genuine friends.
我不想在社交软件上保留这些奇怪的泛泛之交。
Like I don't wanna have these like weird casual acquaintances on
当对方说'我们应该...'时，比如昨晚我坐在一位女士旁边，她正在筹备播客。
when the person's like, we should like, last night I was sitting next to this woman and she's starting a podcast.
她说'能给我你的电话号码吗？'
And she's like, oh, can I grab your number?
我想请教你一些想法。
I'd love to like pick your brain.
我当时就想，好吧，我不能直接拒绝说不行。
And I'm like, well, I can't be like, no.
我不能随便给别人我的电话号码。
I don't give up my phone number.
所以我说，直接在Instagram上私信我吧。
So I said, just DM me on Instagram.
你看到了吗？
You're like, see it?
我不知道。
I don't know.
你打算让人免费请教你的想法？
You're gonna let somebody pick your brain for free?
我没有。
I'm not.
但我不想直接说我不让人免费请教我的想法。
But I didn't wanna say I don't let people pick my brain for free.
就是，我不想
Like, I don't want to
当个混蛋
be a dick.
你们得停止占别人便宜了
You've got to stop picking brains, people.
是啊
Yeah.
别来套我的话
Don't pick my brain.
本集《Lady Gang》由
This episode of Lady Gang is brought to
梅西百货赞助，又到了一年一度我已经买好大部分节日礼物的时节
you by Macy's, and it is that time of year where I have already bought most of my holiday gifts.
而你们大多数人还没开始买，因为你们不爱提前规划
And most of you have not, because you're not planners.
所以如果你是贝卡，想要送出绝非临时准备的礼物，最简单的方法就是一站式购物——梅西百货。
So if you are Becca, and you want to get gifts that feel anything but last minute, the easiest way to do it is a one stop shop Macy's.
他们为每个人都准备了合适的礼物。
They have something for every single person.
我们都经历过这种情况：突然就到18号了，你要去参加节日派对，然后心想：好吧。
And we've all been that all of a sudden it's the eighteenth and you're going to a holiday party and you're like, cool.
我可以把苏西去年在节日派对上送我的蜡烛转送出去，或者我可以提前准备好礼物。
I can regift this candle that Susie literally gave me last year at my holiday party, or I can have things ready to go.
这就是为什么梅西百货准备了所有这些送礼指南。
So that's why Macy's has all these gift guides.
如果你现在登录macys.com，就能看到各种分类：送她的礼物、送他的礼物、儿童礼物、女主人礼物。
If you go on macy's.com right now, you can literally see like gifts for her, gifts for him, gifts for kids, gifts for the hostess.
他们把购物变得如此简单。
Like, they make it so easy.
时尚、家居、香水应有尽有。
Fashion, home, fragrance.
你们都在送什么礼物呀？
What are you guys gifting?
我一直沉迷于梅西百货的所有圣诞餐具，因为现在我们有了自己的家，家里几乎什么都没有。
I have been obsessing over all of their Christmas serveware on Macy's because now that we have our home, I like have nothing in our home.
所以我们所有的装饰品都是全新的。
So all of our decorations are brand new.
所以我一直在逛梅西百货的圣诞装饰区，他们有个叫Villaroy and Botch的品牌，有我这辈子见过最可爱的圣诞马克杯，而且现在正在大促销。
So I have been just all over Macy's Christmas decorations and they have this brand called Villaroy and Botch and the cutest Christmas mugs I've ever seen and they are so on sale right now.
所以
So
我相信你会成为那种喜欢圣诞餐具的人。
I that is believe what you're gonna be like a Christmas dishes kind of person.
噢，我正打算囤货呢。
Oh, I'm stocking up.
我这辈子都没想到你会喜欢圣诞餐具。
I just never in my life thought you were gonna be a Christmas dishes.
说实话，这确实有道理，但我还是感到震惊。
Like, we've gotta bring out the actually, honestly, it makes sense, but I'm I'm shocked.
这就是我。
I'm me.
当然。
Of course.
而且这本来是送别人的礼物，不是给自己的，不过算了。
Also, this was a gift to give someone else, not a gift to give yourself, but fine.
我是说，这可是份持续带来快乐的礼物。
I I mean, that's the gift that keeps on giving.
你懂吗？
You know?
整个十二月你每天早上都能用它喝咖啡，所以这是为大家准备的。
You get to have coffee in it every morning during December, so it's for everyone.
贝卡？
Becca?
好可爱。
So cute.
好的。
Okay.
我大部分给福特买的礼物都在梅西百货选购，因为那里有很多其他商店找不到的精品玩具。
I'm doing a lot of my shopping for Ford on Macy's because there are a lot of great toys on there that you can't find from other places.
不是要指名道姓，但我觉得创意真的很难，而他们有些你根本找不到的东西。
Not to name names, but I think that it's really hard to get creative, and they have things that you really can't find.
福特特别喜欢——感恩节时我们住在我侄子房间，他天花板上贴着那种老式星星贴纸。
Ford's really into we stayed at in my nephew's room over Thanksgiving, and he has those old school stars on the ceiling.
哦，就是那种带粘性的？
Oh, the sticky ones?
对，就是那种带粘性的。
The sticky ones.
我超爱。
And I Love.
他非常喜欢。
He loved it.
所以我最终给他买了这个小闹钟，因为我们正试着教他‘在床上待到几点’之类的规矩。
So I ended up getting him this little clock because we're also kind of in the mode of trying to teach him, like, stay in your bed until this is this time and blah blah blah blah blah.
而且因为他已经认识数字了，这个钟还能把星星投影到天花板上。
And, like, showing him because he knows his numbers and whatever, but this clock projects stars onto the ceiling.
真可爱。
Cute.
所以这是个他能用的小投影装置，我觉得应该会有效。
So it's a little projection thing that he can have, and it really I think it'll help.
不知道。
Don't know.
看起来是个很舒缓的夜间小物件，而且拥有人生第一个小闹钟让他很兴奋。
It seems like a soothing nighttime thing, and it's, like, exciting to still have his first little clock in his room.
是啊。
Yeah.
真可爱。
That's cute.
他们有很多风火轮玩具，昨天他看着我说，圣诞节我只想要风火轮。
They have a ton of Hot Wheels, which is he looked at me yesterday and said, all I want for Christmas is Hot Wheels.
于是我说，太好了。
So I said, great.
我们会给你买更多风火轮，因为我们现有的还不够多。
We'll get you more Hot Wheels because we don't have enough.
太棒了。
Love it.
我去过你家，看到三个篮子。
I've been to your house and I saw three baskets.
所以我觉得你们其实已经够多了，不过尽情享受风火轮吧。
So I feel like you do have enough, but live your life Hot Wheels.
很多很多。
Lots.
克里斯·奈特正在买行李箱。
Chris Knight is getting luggage.
他旅行归来，发现十年前买的行李箱一角已经凹陷，整个箱子都裂开了。
He pulled up from a trip and the luggage he got ten years ago is smashed in one corner and full fully cracked.
我那位高管丈夫居然带着这么恶心的行李箱满世界跑。
My executive husband is traveling around the world with disgusting luggage.
所以他们现在有Samsonite了。
So they have Samsonite.
其实他们还有非常可爱的卡尔·拉格斐行李箱，全白色的，我觉得贴上邮票会很酷。
They actually have, really cute Karl Lagerfeld luggage that I it's, like, all white, and I thought it'd be cool to, put stamps on.
总之，他要去买新行李箱了。
Anyway, he's getting luggage.
现在有很多超值优惠。
There are so many great deals.
梅西百货的节日大促销正在进行中，全场6-4折。
Macy's great gift sale is going on right now, 30 to 60% off.
这是为全家人准备的最佳最后一刻礼物，折扣超过五折，还无需匆忙抢购。
That is over half off the best last minute gifts for everyone in the family without that last minute rush.
别犹豫了。
Don't wait.
请访问macys.com或到实体店选购。
Shop at macy's.com or in store.
感谢梅西百货赞助本播客节目。
And Macy's, thank you for sponsoring this podcast.
还有什么比假日期间去超市更令人愉悦的事呢？
What's more joyful than going to the supermarket during the holidays?
有很多选择。
Lots of stuff.
因此ButcherBox直接将100多种优质蛋白质送到您家门口，包括100%草饲牛肉、散养有机鸡肉、无笼养殖猪肉和野生捕捞海鲜。
That's why ButcherBox delivers over 100 premium protein choices straight to your door, including 100% grass fed beef, free range organic chicken, pork raised, crate free, and wild caught seafood.
近十年来，ButcherBox始终引领行业，提供经独立验证的无抗生素、无激素的肉类和海鲜。
For nearly a decade, ButcherBox has led the industry with meat and seafood that's antibiotic free, hormone free, and independently verified.
这是比杂货店更清洁、更值得信赖的选择，直接送货上门。
It's a cleaner, more trustworthy version of what you find at the grocery store delivered right to your door.
没错。
That's right.
在他们成为赞助商之前，我就已经是他们的顾客了。
I was a customer before they were even a sponsor.
作为一家认证的B型企业，ButcherBox从动物饲养方式到团队对员工的支持及减少环境影响，都致力于高标准。
And as a certified b corp, ButcherBox is committed to high standards from how the animals are raised to how their team supports workers and reduces environmental impact.
此外，每盒产品均免运费，并包含会员专属福利，如食谱灵感小贴士和独家优惠，助您充分利用每一餐。
Plus, every box ships free and includes member only perks like recipe inspo tips and exclusive deals to help you make the most of every meal.
作为独家优惠，我们的听众可在一年内每盒获赠免费牛排，首单还能立减20美元，请访问butcherbox.com/lady。
As an exclusive offer, our listeners can get free steak in every box for a year plus $20 off your first box when you go to butcherbox.com/lady.
没错。
That's right.
您可以选择菲力牛排、纽约客牛排或肋眼牛排，全年每盒都有，首单立减20美元且始终免运费。
Your choice of filet mignon, New York strip, or rib eye in every box for an entire year plus $20 off your first box and free shipping always.
网址是butcherbox.com/lady。
That's butcherbox.com/lady.
别忘了使用我们的链接，这样他们知道是我们推荐你的。
Don't forget to use our links so they know we sent you.
现在回到Lady Gang的话题。
Now back to the lady gang.
我糟糕的一周是，你们知道的，不想显得太矫情，但我正准备卖掉房子搬去公寓住。
My bad week is that, as you know, not to get all sconcey on you, but I'm about to sell my house and move to an apartment.
我真是受够了当房主。
I am so sick of being a homeowner.
我受够了。
I'm done.
我被推销了一个美国梦。
I got sold an American dream.
我现在是个房主了。
I'm now homeowner.
什么东西都在坏。
Everything's breaking.
如果你是第一次听这个播客，我最近刚花了3万美元修屋顶的洞，简直可怕。
If you're new to this podcast, I have recently spent $30,000 fixing a hole in my roof, which is horrific.
几个月前感恩节前，我的冰箱坏了，只能走保险。
And a few months ago before Thanksgiving, my fridge quit and I had to go through insurance.
修理费要3000美元左右。
It was gonna be like $3,000 to fix it.
我当时想，那就走保险吧，但他们要12月8日才能来。
I was like, I'll go through insurance, but they couldn't come until December 8.
然后呢？
So what happens?
我等到12月8日，等了三个星期。
I wait three weeks for December 8 to come.
老兄，凯撒，不是我的凯撒，另一个凯撒早上出现，我就想，太好了。
Man, Caesar, not my Caesar, a different Caesar shows up in the morning and I'm like, great.
今天我终于又能吃胡萝卜条了。
Today is the day I can have a carrot stick again.
结果不行。
Nope.
我等了三周他来了却说：这需要两个人才能完成。
He gets there after I waited three weeks and he was like, this is a two man job.
发票上只安排了一个人。
They only put a one man on the invoice.
我们今天修不了。
We cannot fix it today.
我只能说：太好了。
And I was like, great.
那你们明天什么时候能来？
Well, when will you be back tomorrow?
他说：我们下次能安排两个人的时间是12月26日。
And he said, our next appointment for two men is December 26.
我还没有一个适合男士的冰箱。
I have not had a fridge for men.
找个TaskRabbit（跑腿服务）？
Get a TaskRabbit?
你不行，因为这涉及到压缩机的问题。
You can't because it's like the compressor.
这是个复杂的问题，杰克。
It's a whole thing, Jack.
等你的房子开始出问题时你就会明白了。
You'll get it through once your house starts breaking.
当你去找保险公司时，你得用那些人。
When you go to insurance, you have use those people.
这是个
It's a
彻头彻尾的噩梦。
whole nightmare.
保险。
Insurance.
什么？
What?
是通过保险吗？
It's through insurance?
对。
Yeah.
因为要3000美元，我可不想付这笔钱。
Because it's $3,000, and I don't wanna pay it.
是啊。
Yeah.
这是我
This is first
成年以来头一次觉得，我可能需要开始卖些东西了。
time in my adult life that I'm like, I think I need to start selling shit.
比如，我
Like, I
你能不能在Instagram上求求那些冰箱公司，让他们免费送你一台新冰箱，然后你发帖宣传？
am Can you just go on Instagram and, like, beg some refrigerator companies to send you a new refrigerator for free, and you'll post about it?
但我还得等冰箱送来又送走。
But then I have to wait for the, like, the fridge to come in and out.
我是说，对啊。
Like, I mean, yeah.
当然。
Sure.
而且这台冰箱我是免费得的。
And this fridge I got for free.
我知道。
I know.
但你很可能还能再弄一台。
But you could probably get another one.
但它会匹配的。
But it will match.
我是说，有太多东西了。
I mean, there's just so many things.
我只是
I'm just
哦，想要
oh, want
先弄个迷你冰箱用着。
Get a mini get a mini fridge for now.
我的迷你冰箱，我的酒柜。
My mini fridge, my wine fridge.
它温度没那么低，但有时候我喜欢做个Stouffer太太的苹果派。
It doesn't go quite as cold, but it's like, sometimes I like to make a missus Stouffer's apple pie.
你冰箱里有...那是冷冻柜。
You have fridge a in your in your That's a freezer.
哦，你车库里只有个冰柜吗？
Oh, it's only a freezer in your garage?
是的。
Yes.
只是
Just
往你那小气泡冰盒里随便扔点东西。
throw some shit in your little bubble ice thing.
我是说，这些事情我都在做，但毫无乐趣可言。
I mean, I am doing all of those things, but it's not enjoyable.
比如，我不得不把莎莎酱吐出来。
Like, I had to throw up my salsa.
懂了吗？
Okay?
总之。
Anyway.
好吧。
Alright.
抱歉。
Sorry.
我本周的好消息是，正如你们所知，我现在变得非常社交了。
My good week is that, as you guys know, I'm super social now.
我被邀请参加一个非常社交的活动。
I got invited to something super social.
哦。
Oh.
我会参加各种活动。
I go to things.
昨晚我还被邀请去凯西·希尔顿家参加派对。
And I got invited to Kathy Hilton's house last night for a party.
不过这也没什么特别的，因为凯西·希尔顿几乎每晚都会举办派对。
Now, it's not that special because Kathy Hilton literally has a party every night.
所以别觉得我有多高端。
So don't think I was, like, fancy.
但我确实收到了邀请，后来差点临时反悔说不去了。
But I did get invited, and then I almost pulled out and said, don't wanna go at the last minute.
但转念一想，不行。
But then I was like, no.
不能做那种人。
Don't be that person.
我们当时在庆祝辛迪·埃克特，她研发了那种粉色药丸。
So we were celebrating Cindy Eckert, who makes the pharmaceutical addy.
她之前上过播客节目。
She's been on the podcast before.
她有个关于这种粉色药丸的新纪录片，凯西专门为她办了这场活动。
She has a new documentary all about this pink pill, and Kathy was throwing a a thing in her honor.
我们就去了。
We went.
非常棒。
It was great.
见到了很多人。
Saw lots of people.
超级有趣。
It was super fun.
但最棒的部分是，就像，仅仅是待在凯西·希尔顿的家里。
But the best part about it was, like, just being in Kathy Hilton's house.
我要好好说说这事。
And I'm gonna talk about it.
不知道这是否会让我显得不太得体。
I don't know if this puts me in, like, an like, a bad place.
但这个女人拥有如此多的圣诞树。
But, like, this woman has so many Christmas trees.
这就像，你知道自己很富有。
It is like, you know you're rich.
杰克，朱迪斯渴望成为的样子。
Jack, it is what Judith aims to be.
她让你进门，左边有棵树，大概有两层楼那么高。
She has you come in, there is a tree that is so it's probably two stories high to the left.
太美了，粉色的，华丽的设计师款圣诞树。
So beautiful, pink, gorgeous, like, designer tree.
这棵树下的礼物，我想她是为慈善收集的。
The presents under this tree, I think she collects them for charity.
它们都没包装，我觉得这是她圣诞派对的一部分。
Like, none of them were wrapped, so I feel like it's, like, part of her Christmas party thing.
总之，太棒了。
Anyway, amazing.
人们端着精致的小点心。
People serving little canapes.
你走进一个侧厅，她有个圣诞主题房间——抱歉要这样对你，犹太裔的贝卡，但
You go into one side room, then she has a room of Christmas that is sorry to do this to you, Jewish, Becca, but
没关系。
That's fine.
她有一个圣诞主题房间，就像是杰克·朱迪斯的传统圣诞屋。
She has a room of Christmas that is, like, Jack Judith is Judith's traditional Christmas room.
所以那里有棵树和一个房间，专门放她家人的各种杂物。
So it's a tree and a room where she puts all the shit from her family.
比如巴黎幼儿园做的手工，还有那些难看的东西。
Like, the stuff Paris made in, like, kindergarten and, like, all of the ugly stuff.
红红绿绿的色调就像过去那些俗气的传统圣诞节。
And it's like that red, green, yellow of, like, Christmases pass, like, tacky traditional.
我爱死它了。
I love it.
然后你下楼就会发现所有东西都像高端设计师作品。
Then you go downstairs and everything's, like, crazy designer.
天花板上飘着气球。
There's balloons on the roof.
简直太惊艳了。
Like, it is just so fabulous.
我就想，当你都能去凯西·希尔顿家参观，谁还需要去博物馆或植物园看节日季的灯展呢？
And I'm like, who needs to go to, like, the museum or the Botanical Gardens for the drive through of the holiday season when you can just go to Kathy Hilton's house?
关于凯西最棒的是，有两件事特别能体现她的风格。
Now the greatest thing about Kathy, two things that happen that are so Kathy.
就像我真的在演《家庭主妇》剧集一样。
It was like I was in a real episode of Housewives.
所以我就说，嘿，凯西。
So I was like, hey, Kathy.
悉尼当时说，我们和凯尔蒂合个影吧。
Sydney was like, let's get a picture with Keltie.
然后她又说，我们和凯尔蒂合个影吧。
And and she was like, let's get a picture with Keltie.
我们要把它发到网上。
We're gonna put it up on e.
我当时就说，太好了。
And I was like, great.
那个公关人员。
The publicist.
然后凯西就拿出她的化妆包，开始整理头发。
So Kathy, like, pulls out her makeup bag and she's like she's fixing her hair.
她还说，哦，对了。
And she goes, oh, yeah.
不行。
No.
我这周晚些时候要和你们一起做点事。
I'm doing something with you guys later this week.
我就说，哦，真的吗？
And I was like, oh, really?
和谁一起？
Who with?
然后她说，哦，和这个人一起。
And she goes, oh, with this guy.
我就说，哦，那是ET。
And I was like, oh, that's ET.
然后她说，哦，对啊。
And she goes, oh, yeah.
他们是最棒的。
They're the best.
接着她滔滔不绝地讲了大概三分钟，说她最喜欢的采访者是《今夜娱乐》的布莱斯。
And then she goes on for, like, three minutes about how her favorite interviewer is Bryce from Entertainment Tonight.
天啊。
Oh my god.
她
She's
还说，他真的很棒。
like, he's so great.
他总是对内容了如指掌。
He always knows his stuff.
而且不会设陷阱，简直是有史以来最棒的采访。
And like, doesn't trick you and like, it's just the best interview ever.
我当时就说，你是认真的吗，对。
And I was like, you really you yes.
好吧。
Okay.
然后她说，我就问，你头发里是不是有金属丝挑染？
And then she was like and I was like, do you have tinsel highlights in your hair?
她说，是的。
She's like, yes.
我参加了Call Her Daddy音乐节，你知道的，或者应该说是我先上了Call Her Daddy播客，然后被邀请去了音乐节。
I did the Call Her Daddy festival and, you know, and then I got or I did the Call Her Daddy podcast, and then I got invited to the festival.
她给我弄了金属丝挑染发型，天哪。
And she gave me tinsel hair, and oh my god.
这是全世界最棒的播客。
It is the best podcast in the world.
她就这样滔滔不绝地说个不停。
And she just went on and on and on.
我真的就像，我看着
And I literally was like, I looked
站在这里的安迪。
at Andy standing right here.
我当时真的在看着她的公关安迪·加尔普。
I was literally looking at Andy Galp, who's her publicist.
我就说，我求了凯西十年让她上《Lady Gang》节目。
I was like, I've only asked for Kathy to be on Lady Gang for ten years.
我当时就想，我真的不想再待在这里了。
Like, I was just like, I don't wanna be here anymore.
不过不管怎样，她真的很美。
But anyway, she was beautiful.
她真人非常漂亮。
She's so pretty in real life.
在播客里看不出来。
You don't see it on the podcast.
或者在节目里也看不出来。
I or on the show.
我觉得她根本不在乎，所以不像其他女孩那样精心打扮，结果看起来就有点丑。
I think she doesn't give a and so she doesn't, like, do the glam that the other girls do, so she ends up looking ugly.
但她其实不丑。
But she's not ugly.
她很美。
She's beautiful.
我不觉得她在节目里看起来很丑。
I don't think she looks ugly on the show.
她只是总有点不修边幅。
She's always just a little disheveled.
是啊。
Yeah.
昨晚她打扮得特别精致。
She was very put together last night.
皮肤超好，头发也美，完全就是过着顶级富婆生活。
Like beautiful skin, beautiful hair, like just living her best rich life.
对了，我能再爆点料吗？
And then can I tell you a little bit more tea?
好啊。
Yeah.
我旁边坐了个卷进大学招生丑闻的女人。
I sat next to a woman who was involved in the college admissions scandal.
天啊。
Oh my god.
你知道吗，这太搞笑了。
You know, it's so funny.
不是Lori Loughlin。
It wasn't Lori Loughlin.
倒也不是无名之辈，是另一个涉案女性。
It was like a no not a no name, but like another one of the women.
她被卷进来是因为确实参与了。
And she got pulled into it because she did it.
她和那个叫Marty Singer还是Jay Singer的家伙合作过。
She worked with the guy, Marty Singer, Jay Singer, whatever.
她被卷入了这件事，但因为有名人的参与而成了大新闻，可她本人并不出名。
And she got pulled into it, but it became a big story because the famous people were involved, but she's not famous.
她是个CEO之类的。
She was like a CEO.
我前几天还看到关于这个的梗图。
I saw a meme about that the other day.
他们还说，我们能不能集体同意这其实不是什么大事？
And they're like, can we all just collectively agree that that wasn't that big of a deal?
我就是这么跟她说的。
That's what I said to her.
因为我的意思是，我们现在对生活、对富人如何运作以及他们如何花钱打通一切都有了更深的了解。
Because it's like I mean, I mean, we know so much more now just in life and how, like, rich people work and just, like, buy their way into anything.
但如果这事发生在现在，根本没人会在意
But, like, if that happened now, nobody would give a
所以我说，如果是一群男人在高尔夫球场上这么做，根本不会引起轩然大波。
That's why said, I was like, if it was a bunch of guys that did it, if it was men on the golf course and they were all doing it, it wouldn't have been a thing.
确实。
No.
非常正确。
Very true.
我就想，把女儿PS进赛艇队和捐几百万给大学建个楼有什么区别？孩子太笨考不上，但这样就能被录取。
I'm like, what's the difference of photoshopping your daughter on the rowing team and, like, donating millions of dollars to do a wing in the college that your kid's too dumb to get it accepted to, but that gets them in.
我是说，自从有大学以来人们就一直这么干。
I mean, people have been doing this since the beginning of college time.
我同意。
I agree.
我能透露点内幕消息给你吗？
Can I tell you a little bit inside information?
你对这个感兴趣吗？
Are you interested in that?
当然。
Sure.
当然。
Sure.
好的。
Okay.
所以她告诉我他们抓你的方式——我甚至不知道这事有没有曝光。
So she told me that the way they got you I don't even know if this came out.
他们抓你的方式基本上是她有个朋友突然问：天啊，你为约翰上大学做了什么准备？
The way they got you is that basically like a friend of hers was like, oh my god, what are you doing for John for college?
然后她说，'哦，你知道的，他数学成绩不好，但我们会想办法的。'
And she's like, oh, you know, his math scores are bad, but like, we're gonna figure it out.
她又问，'哦，你没请咨询顾问吗？'
And she's like, oh, you haven't hired a consultant?
她回答，'没有啊，我需要请吗？'
And she was like, no, do I need to?
对方说，'是的。'
And she's like, yes.
于是她面试了两位顾问，一位在布伦特伍德，另一位在西区。
And so she interviewed two and one was like in Brentwood and one was on the West Side.
她说，'我要选离我近的那位。'
And she was like, I want the one that's closer to me.
我可不想穿城而过。
I don't wanna drive across town.
她就是这样选中了那个最终让她入狱的家伙。
That's literally how she picked the guy that ended up her in jail.
然后他基本上会来你家，检查所有东西，然后说‘凭这些分数你进不了任何大学’。
So then he basically comes to your house and he looks over everything and he's like, you're not gonna get accepted to any college with these scores.
接着对你进行煤气灯效应操控。
And then gaslights you.
后来那些大学表示，因为他最终确实进了所正规大学，他们说‘你本来就能进我们这里’。
And then later, the colleges were like, we because he ended up getting into a real college and they were like, you would have gotten in here.
你懂吧？
Like, you know?
总之她后来告诉我——如果你关注这事可能已经知道了——在SAT考试作弊或是贿赂监考老师改分数这类事本身不算重罪。
Anyway, so then she told me that actually, I think you probably know this if you followed it, but lying on the SAT or whatever and paying bribing the proctor to change your scores or whatever is not a felony.
构成重罪的是他们把考试成绩通过邮件寄送。
What the felony was, was that they put the test results in the mail.
因为他们涉及邮件...邮件欺诈？
And because they mailed Mail fraud?
欺诈。
Fraud.
邮件欺诈。
Mail fraud.
这就是他们入狱的原因。
That's what they went to jail for.
邮件欺诈。
Mail fraud.
这太疯狂了。
That's so crazy.
我就喜欢司法系统的这些漏洞，你懂吗？
I love how like the loopholes of the justice system, you know?
我当时就想，邮件欺诈？
I was like, mail fraud?
太疯狂了。
Crazy.
大家要小心你在邮件里放的东西。
Be careful what you put in the mail, people.
总之，不是的
Anyway No.
你说完了吗？
Are you done?
我想是的
I think so.
不
No.
但我正想说，同样地，我们能不能讨论一下Diddy实际上只在监狱里待了大约五十天还是五十个月这件事？
But I was just gonna say, can we in the same vein, can we discuss the fact that Diddy really is only spending like fifty days in prison or something or fifty months in prison?
我是说，别让我开始这个话题
I mean, don't get me started.
直到我看了五十美分的纪录片才意识到，那是怎么...
Don't get didn't realize until I was watching the fifty Cent documentary, and it was How
怎么回事？
is it?
我应该
Should I
看吗？
watch it?
对。
Yeah.
有些内容我们已经知道了，有些不太有趣，但有些确实挺有意思的。
There's like there's like stuff we already knew and then stuff that's like not that interesting and then stuff that actually is.
就像是
It's like
嗯。
Yeah.
还有些他们压根就没提到的事情。
And stuff that they completely didn't even acknowledge.
但50确实做到了。
But is 50 did it.
而且，你知道，50 Cent对Diddy怀有史上最久的积怨。
And, you know, fifty Cent has the longest grudge of all time against Diddy.
所以就像他呈现事情的方式那样。
So it's like the way that he presented things.
就像他们采访了其中两名陪审员，因为这些陪审员都是白痴。
It's like so they interviewed two of the jurors because these jurors are idiots.
而被采访的两人中，他显得很聪明，因为其中一名陪审员暴露了自己是粉丝。
And the two that they interviewed, it's like, he's so smart because one of the jurors outed herself as a fan.
但我觉得他们在采访时，她明明说'我对Diddy一无所知'。
But like, I'm pretty sure when they were interviewing, she's like, I don't know anything about Diddy.
结果她在采访中说'是啊，Diddy会像在《Making the Band》里那样点头'。
So she says on the interview, she's like, yeah, Diddy would of nod his head like he did on Making the Band.
问题是，如果你要当公正的陪审员，当初就不该看《Making the Band》。
And it's like, you shouldn't have watched Making the Band if you were going to be an unbiased juror.
而他们采访的另一位陪审员则说'为什么Cassie不直接离开呢？'
And then the other guy that they interviewed, the juror was like, he said, why didn't Cassie just leave?
她事后还给他发情书呢。
She was like sending him lovey notes afterwards.
他为什么不离开？
Why didn't he leave?
如果他虐待她，她为什么不直接离开？
If he was abusing her, why didn't she just leave?
我就觉得这太荒谬了。
And I'm like, this is insane.
这简直太疯狂了。
This is absolutely insane.
所以基本上，这些陪审员简直荒谬至极，但他在其中做的那些微妙操作更让人无语。
So basically, it's like these jurors are literally it's pretty nuts, but it's like nuanced things that he did in there.
而且他基本上也向所有人证明了Diddy就是个嫉妒所有人的失败者。
And he basically also proved to everybody that Diddy was just like a loser that was jealous of everybody.
我的意思是，他简直就是骨子里都坏透了。
Like he wasn't like, I mean, he is literally evil to his core.
他也是个失败者。
He's also like a loser.
而且他就是嫉妒别人翻唱他们的歌。
And he was just jealous of people jumped on their songs.
然后大家突然意识到，我根本想不起任何一首Diddy的歌。
And then like, everybody's like, I just realized that I don't know a single Diddy song.
Diddy有什么代表作吗？
What's a Diddy song?
除了那首他为Biggie写的歌——就是那首他让Biggie自掏腰包办葬礼，然后还践踏他坟墓的歌。
Other than the one that he wrote about Biggie that he made Biggie pay for his own funeral and then like walked all over his grave.
除此之外，
Other than that one, it's like,
Diddy的歌？
a Diddy song?
把他塑造成彻头彻尾的失败者，这手笔可真漂亮。
Did beautiful job of making him look like a complete loser.
而且，他肯定不是什么性感反派。
And like, he's certainly not like, a a sexy villain.
懂吗？
You know?
他就是把对方塑造成一个既失败又恶劣的人。
He just made him look like a loser that was also a bad person.
是啊。
Yeah.
确实如此。
Which yeah.
这就好比，要是...
It's like, what if
失败者？
loser?
我要告诉你们一件事，其实你们早就知道了。
I'm gonna tell you something, and you guys know this already.
大多数所谓成功人士其实都是失败者。
Most of the people that are, like, that successful are losers.
哦，是啊。
Oh, yeah.
因为他们全都只是嫉妒罢了。
Because it's like they're all just jealous.
就像那个嫉妒图帕克和比吉的人，最后是他杀了他们。
Like, that's all he who's jealous of Tupac and Biggie, and then he killed them.
好吧，我不会杀人，但我的灵魂深处知道我有获得巨大成功的潜质。
Well, I'm not gonna kill anyone, but, like, I know that in my soul, have what it takes to be very successful.
但当你剥开表象，她的本质不过是个拼命想赢的失败者。
But when you peel back the onion, at the bottom of her is just a try hard loser.
可悲的是，那些真正有人性、可爱又酷的人——真正酷的人——他们永远达不到那种成功高度。
And unfortunately, like, the people that are, like, real humans and that are lovely and cool actually cool, they never reach the level of success Yeah.
就是那种级别的成功，因为他们不够卑鄙。
That is like that level because they're not up enough.
他们还不够拼命，做不到为了达到那个层次而不择手段。
They're not like desperate enough to do what it takes to get to that level.
你懂我意思吗？
You know what mean?
我完全同意。
I completely agree.
这就是为什么我认为亿万富翁里没有好人。
And that's why I don't think that there are any good people that are billionaires.
我觉得每个亿万富翁本质上都是坏人，总有这样那样的原因。
Like I think every billionaire is pretty much an evil person for some reason or another.
但我不得不说，有些人成为亿万富翁是靠非常奇怪的东西，比如科技。
But I do have to say there are people who become billionaires by, like, very weird things like like tech.
不是Facebook那种科技，而是他们发明的某个随机专利产品，赚了无数钱。
Not Facebook tech, but like a random invention that they created that is patented and made like a bajillion dollars.
我认为亿万富翁规则也有例外。
I think that there are exceptions to the billionaire rule.
高调的亿万富翁很可疑。
Think a loud billionaire is suspect.
普通的亿万富翁可能很优秀。
A regular billionaire can be great.
不。
No.
我知道是因为认识一个人，他发明并专利了某种特定技术，现在每家公司都在用。他让商业进步了30年，懂吗？就凭他自学编程创造的那个东西，把行业向前推进了光年距离。
I know because know a guy here who created like, he just patented like this specific type of technology that now every company uses because he like advanced business like by 30, you know, he like took them light years ahead with this one thing that he learned how to code and create and whatever.
所以他是个纯粹的天才。
So he's just a genius.
对。
Yeah.
也许关键在于，那些并非真正天才的亿万富翁才是坏人。
Maybe what it is is the billionaires that aren't actually geniuses are bad people.
没错。
Yeah.
嗯，就是，我是说，也许，听着，我认为所有亿万富翁都是这样，但我现在有点心不在焉。
Well, it's just, I mean, maybe it's, I mean, listen, I think it's all billionaires, but I'm, you know, that's my mind is somewhere else.
但我觉得那些大公司的CEO们也是如此。
But I think it's also just like those big, big CEOs.
就像你不可能不踩着别人往上爬，不对人刻薄就能登上顶峰。
It's like you can't get to the top without like walking all over people and without treating people terribly.
因为正常人根本不会那么在乎这些。
Like there's just no way because a normal person wouldn't care that much.
没错，百分之百同意。
No, 100%.
我是说，再次扮演魔鬼代言人。
I mean, again, devil's advocate.
我有个朋友就是CEO，他的公司即将被收购，而他是我见过最真诚善良的好人。
I have a friend who's a CEO, who's about to sell his company, and he's the most genuinely kind, wonderful person.
你也认识他的。
You know him too.
我？
Me?
不过确实。
But yeah.
你见过他的。
You've met him.
但是，他打造了一个非常、非常、非常成功的品牌。
But, like, he built a really, really, really, really successful brand.
之所以如此成功，部分原因在于他的员工非常尊敬他，他们看到了他的勤奋并与之匹配。
And part of the reason that it's so successful is because his employees, like, very much respected him and they, like, saw his hustle and they matched his hustle.
现在他即将以近十亿美元的价格出售自己创建的公司。
And then now he's, like, selling his company that he built for close to a billion dollars.
而且他在业内确实以最善良、最优秀的人之一著称。
And he's really, like, known in the industry as one of the kindest, most wonderful people.
或者你指的是那些例外。
Or you have the exceptions.
我是说，我坚持我的观点，但确实存在
I mean, stand by my statement, but there are
很多这样的人。
a lot of them.
是的。
Yes.
我认为有很多非常差劲的人最终赚了大钱，因为他们愿意做很多其他正常善良的人不愿意做的事
I think there are a lot of really shitty people who end up making a ton of money because they're willing to do a lot of things that like other normal good people aren't willing
要做的事。
to do.
我觉得多莉·帕顿是个好人，而且她是个亿万富翁。
I think Dolly Parton is a good person, and she's a billionaire.
你知道吗？
You know?
她是亿万富翁吗？
Is she a billionaire?
她肯定是个亿万富翁。
She's gotta be a billionaire.
哇。
Wow.
你知道多莉·帕顿拥有塞多纳的粉色吉普车旅游公司吗？
Did you know that Dolly Parton owns the Pink Jeep Tours in Sedona?
真可爱。
That's cute.
我不知道
I didn't
所以知道她
So know she's
有她的
got her
手伸进了所有这些领域。
hand in all these buckets.
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