给完美主义者和拖延症患者的建议

欢迎收听今天的心态导师播客节目。我是主持人罗伯·戴尔。如果你还没有订阅，请点击订阅按钮，这样你就不会错过任何一期节目。如果你喜欢这个播客，请帮我一个小忙。

Welcome to today's episode of the mindset mentor podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another episode. Episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, do me a real quick favor.

今天把这个播客分享给你认识、你爱的人，或者你认为可能对他们有所帮助的人。这样可以让它影响更多人的生活，也希望它能给你爱的人带来积极影响。如果你这么做，我会非常感激。今天我要谈谈完美主义，我要告诉你们这些自称完美主义者的人，实际上你们正在通过宣称和认为自己是个完美主义者来毁掉自己的生活。让我们开始深入探讨吧。

Share this podcast today with somebody who you know, who you love, who you think might help in some sort of way. It just allows it to impact more people's lives and hopefully impact some people that you love as well. So if you do that, I'd greatly appreciate it. Today, I'm gonna be talking about perfectionism, and I'm gonna talk to you about how you people out there that are perfectionists are actually ruining your lives by proclaiming and thinking that you're a perfectionist. Let's go ahead and dive into it.

完美主义常常被视为一种荣誉徽章。哦，我是个完美主义者。这就是我如此努力工作的原因。这就是我成为现在这样的原因。这就是为什么我在发布作品之前要确保它尽可能完美。

Perfectionism is often viewed as this badge of honor. Oh, I'm a perfectionist. That's why I work so hard. That's why I am the way that I am. That's why I try to make sure that my stuff is as good as I can before I put it out.

人们自豪地宣称，我是个完美主义者。这被视为高标准或卓越生产力的标志。但事实上，完美主义只是某种伪装成完美主义的恐惧。完美主义是你用来掩盖背后某种恐惧的面具。完美主义是不敢迈出脚步的借口，因为，哦，我还没准备好。

People proudly proclaim, I'm a perfectionist. It's this sign of high standards or exceptional productivity. But the truth is perfectionism is just some sort of fear that is disguised as perfectionism. Perfectionism is the mask that you wear to hide some sort of fear that's behind it. Perfectionism is the excuse not to jump because, oh, I'm it's not ready yet.

我还没准备好。我还在完善这个。我还在让它变得更好，但真正的问题应该是，为什么我一开始就害怕迈出这一步？因为迈出这一步意味着暴露自己。跳跃意味着被看见，意味着把自己展现出来，而被看见意味着我可能会被拒绝、被评判，或者别人可能会对我指手画脚。

I'm not ready yet. I'm I'm still finishing this up. I'm still making it even better, but the real question needs to be, why am I afraid of jumping in the first place? Because the jump means exposure. That's why The leap means being seen and putting yourself out there, and being seen means that I might be rejected or judged or other people might throw their opinions at me.

这就是我们大多数人不愿直面的根源，所以我们做了什么？我们称之为，哦，我有高标准。我们就是这样说的。一旦我们理解了这一点，明白了完美主义实际上在多大程度上阻碍了我们，我们就能开始克服它，更自由地生活。所以当你审视完美主义时，完美主义到底是什么？

That's the the root that most of us don't want to name, And so instead, what do you do? We call it, oh, I have high standards. That's that's what we say. And once we understand this and we understand how much perfectionism is actually holding us back, we can begin to overcome it and live a life more freely. And so when you look at perfectionism, like what is perfectionism really?

完美主义并不是关于完美。事实上，完美是一个完全不可能实现的目标，你也知道这一点。一旦你退一步思考，你真的知道这是不可能的。比如，完美到底是什么？你曾经问过自己这个问题吗？

Perfectionism isn't about being perfect. In fact, perfection is a completely impossible goal, and you know it is. You really do know that it is once you take a step back. Like, what is perfect anyways? You ever ask yourself that?

所以无论你多努力，总会有可以做得更好或不同的地方。这就是我们所说的完美主义。哦，是的，我正在尝试。我...我正在发布前努力让它变得更好。

So no matter how hard you try, there's always going to be something that you could have done better or differently. That's what we call perfectionism. Oh, yeah. I'm trying. I'm I'm trying to make it better before I release it.

那么这背后真正的原因是什么？就像我说的，是隐藏在背后的恐惧，通常是对不够好的恐惧、对失败的恐惧、对被评判的恐惧、对被拒绝的恐惧，或者对他人看法的恐惧。如果我们再深入挖掘，这是一种恐惧：如果人们看到真实的你，那个混乱、有缺陷的人，他们就会离开。这不是生产力问题。这是一种创伤，而创伤需要的是同情，而不是批评。

So what is it really about? Like I said, it's the fear that's behind it, and usually it's the fear of not being good enough or the fear of failure or the fear of judgment or the fear of rejection or the fear of other people's opinions. And if we dig even deeper than all of that, it's this fear that if people see the real you, the messy, flawed human, then they'll walk away. That's not a productivity issue. That's a wound, and a wound needs compassion, not criticism.

我们害怕展现自己的原因，是因为我们不想被拒绝，或者害怕他人的看法、失败等等。所以我们想，如果我被拒绝，那就相当于有人离我而去，而这与生产力无关。这是我内心深处最需要同情的那部分。因此，这些恐惧会突然出现，并可能使我们瘫痪，让我们相信，如果我们再努力一点，或者等到一切都完美无缺，我们就能以某种方式避免那种痛苦、拒绝或失望。我总爱举的一个例子，我在书中也写过，完美主义基本上就像：如果你去一个认识了十年的同事家，比如，你去了他们家，碰巧走进其中一个房间，然后你意识到，天啊。

The reason why we're afraid of putting ourselves out there is because we don't wanna be rejected or other people's opinions or failure or whatever it might be. And so we're thinking if I am rejected, that's the equivalent of somebody walking away from me, and that's not the productivity. That's the the part of me that really needs compassion more than anything else. And so we have these fears that pop up and these fears can paralyze us, making believe that making us believe that if we work just like a a little bit harder or if we just wait until everything is flawless, then we will avoid that pain or that rejection or that disappointment in some sort of way. And the example I always love, and I wrote about this in my book, for perfectionism is basically like if you go to a friend's house that you've known from work for ten years, say, and you go to their house and you happen to go into one of their rooms and you realize, oh my god.

到处都是这些漂亮的画作。你看着这些画，你会说，天啊，我甚至不知道你会画画。这太棒了。

There's all these beautiful paintings everywhere. And they're looking you're looking at these paintings. You're like, oh my god. I didn't even know you painted. Like, this is amazing.

这也太棒了。你为什么不把你的艺术作品展示出来？为什么不试着卖你的画？他们会说，哦，不行。就是...我...我...你知道，它们还没准备好。

This is amazing too. Like, why don't you put your art somewhere? Why don't you try to sell your art? And they're like, oh, no. Like, it's I I I just you know, they're not ready yet.

比如这幅，差不多完成了，但我还需要修改一些地方。还有这幅，我也需要修改一些地方。就是还没准备好。你知道，我有点完美主义。实际上，那个人害怕的是把自己的艺术展示给别人并被拒绝。

Like, this one right here, it's almost done, but, like, I still need to fix some things. And this one right here, I also need to fix some things. There's it's just not ready yet. You know, I'm just kind of a perfectionist. Really, what that person is afraid of is showing their art to somebody and being rejected.

他们真正害怕的是举办一场艺术展，让一大群人来看他们的作品，然后他们看到价格标签会说，天啊，这要一千美元？我连十块钱都不会付，因为人们觉得这是我展示的东西，这是我的一部分。如果有人拒绝了我的这一部分，那就说明在某种程度上我是一个被拒绝的人。所以这不是懒惰。

What are really what they're afraid of is is doing an art show and having a whole bunch of people come and they see their art and they look at the the the price tag and they're like, oh my god. That's a thousand dollars? I wouldn't pay $10 for that because people feel like this is what I'm putting out, and this is a piece of me. And if somebody rejects this piece of me, then it shows me that I am a reject in some sort of way. And so it's not laziness.

这绝对不是懒惰。所以如果你仔细看，它到底是什么？嗯，你知道，这是一种自我保护，因为如果它从未被展示给世界看，我就永远不会被评判。因此，完美主义，比什么都重要，是一种应对机制。它不是一种美德。抱歉，各位。

It's definitely not laziness. And so if you look at it, what is it exactly? Well, you know, it's self protection because if it's never out there for the world to see, I can never be judged, And so perfectionism, more than anything else, is a coping mechanism. It's not a virtue. Sorry, guys.

这是一种控制或试图控制结果的方式，以保护我们自己免受脆弱性的伤害。因此，它背后的恐惧，如果你仔细观察完美主义，你会发现完美主义通常是建立在三种核心恐惧的不同版本之上的。第一，对失败的恐惧。我们害怕失败。完美主义者常常以某种方式将错误或失败等同于个人失败。

It's a way of controlling or trying to control the outcomes in an attempt to protect ourselves from vulnerability. And so the the fear behind it, like if you look closely at perfectionism, you'll find that perfectionism is built on usually a different version of three core fears. Number one, the fear of failure. We're afraid of failing. Perfectionisms or perfectionists often equate mistakes or failure in some sort of way with personal failure.

如果出了什么问题，那么我认为这反映了我作为一个人的本质，这就造成了巨大的压力，要求我总是把事情做对，以避免某种未来的痛苦。但如果你审视它，你可以重新定义它。你可以重新定义并说，嘿，搞砸或失败并不是我自我价值的反映。它比什么都重要。它是我愿意尝试的反映。

If something goes wrong, then I think that it reflects who I am as a person, and this creates this immense amount of pressure to always do things right to avoid some form of future pain. But if you look at it, you can kind of reframe it. You can reframe and say, hey, like messing up or failure isn't a reflection of my self worth. It's more than anything else. It's a reflection of my willingness to try.

我宁愿有尝试的意愿，也不愿什么都不做，所以你实际上可以从尝试中获得更多的自我价值，而不是将你的自我价值与你是失败还是成功，或者别人对你的看法挂钩。从不失败的人通常是那些从不冒险的人，如果你在生活中不冒任何风险，你就是在冒失去一切的风险。在某件事上失败并不会让你成为一个失败者。每个人都在某些事情上失败过。世界上最成功的人失败的次数比不成功的人尝试的次数还要多。

I would rather have willingness to try than not do something, and so you can actually get more self worth just from trying than by attaching yourself worth to if you fail or if you succeed or what other people think of you. People who never fail are usually the ones that never risk, and if you don't risk anything in your life, you risk everything. Failing at something doesn't make you a failure. Everyone has failed at something. The most successful people in the world have failed more times than the unsuccessful people have tried.

因此，失败和成功并不是两个对立的事物。它们实际上是同一枚硬币的两面。为了让我获得成功的生活，达到任何意义上的成功，无论是快乐、幸福、爱情、庞大的事业、千万富翁，无论是什么，我也需要在路上失败。因此，阻碍人们前进的最大恐惧之一就是对失败的恐惧。第二个出现的恐惧是对评判的恐惧。

And so failure and success are not two opposite things. They're they're really two sides to the exact same coin. In order for me to get to having a successful life and to getting to whatever success means, joy, happiness, love, massive business, multimillionaire, whatever it is, I need to fail on the way as well. And so that's one of the biggest fears that really holds people back is the fear of failure. The second fear that pops up in that is the fear of judgment.

许多完美主义者害怕被别人评判，因为他们可能在童年时期遭受过很多评判，所以他们担心，如果他们的工作、绘画、外貌或其他任何东西不是完美无瑕的，那么人们就会看不起他们。而这种对认可的持续需求导致了无休止的调整和精炼，常常阻止他们完成任何任务，而且，你知道，社交媒体只会将这种恐惧放大到有毒的水平。你知道，你发了一个帖子。一个帖子，你得到一个评论，或者得到一个一般的反应，我们的内心批评者就会失控。对吧？

Many people who are perfectionists fear being judged by other people because they probably had a lot of judgment in their childhood, and so they worry that if their work, or their paintings, or their appearance, whatever it might be isn't flawless, then people will think less of them. And this this constant need for approval leads to, like, endless tweaking and refining and often preventing them from finishing any task, and, you know, social media has only amplified this fear to, like, toxic levels. You know, you put up a post. One post and you get, like, one comment or you get, like, one meh reaction, and our inner critic just, like, can spiral. Right?

但你并不是别人对你的看法。即使没有人鼓掌，你也是你决定成为的那个人。重要的不是别人怎么看你，而是你怎么看自己，这才是生活中最重要的。所以这是第二个非常重要的恐惧。

But you're not other people's opinion of you. You are who you decide to be even when nobody claps. It's not about what other people think of you. It's what you think of you, and that's really what is the most important in life. So that's the second fear that's really important in that.

第三个非常重要的恐惧是对脆弱的恐惧。完美主义的核心是试图避免脆弱。通过追求难以企及的完美，完美主义者认为他们可以保护自己免受批评、拒绝或羞耻，但脆弱是人类的一部分。比如，避免与他人产生脆弱感，尤其是在浪漫关系或与子女相处中，但总的来说，回避它只会带来更多压力和挫败感。所以脆弱并不是一种弱点。

And the third fear that's really important is the fear of vulnerability. At its core, perfectionism is about trying to avoid vulnerability. So by striving for unattainable perfection, perfectionists think that they can protect themselves from criticism or rejection or shame, but vulnerability is part of of being a human. Like, avoiding vulnerability with other people, even, like, especially in, a romantic or with your children, but just in general, avoiding it only leads to more stress and frustration. So vulnerability isn't a weakness.

当我们思考脆弱时，我们认为别人会觉得我们软弱，但当我们看到另一个人表现出脆弱时，我们从不认为他们软弱。我们总是想，天哪，那个人真勇敢。你必须意识到，人们会认为你的脆弱是勇敢的。他们会看到你展示自己的画作，然后惊叹，天哪，太棒了。

Vulnerability, when really look at when we think about being vulnerable, we think that other people will think that that we're being weak, but when we see another person who's being vulnerable, we never think they're weak. We're always like, oh my god. That person's so courageous, and you have to realize you're gonna have people think that your vulnerability is courageous. They're gonna see you put your paintings out and be like, oh my god. That's amazing.

我也想展示我的画作。我们马上回来。现在回到节目。对吧？没有它，你无法建立有意义的生活。

I wanna put my paintings out. And we will be right back. And now back to the show. Right? You can't build a meaningful life without it.

而且，你知道，完美是无法实现的。完美主义是基于恐惧的。它也非常不切实际。你知道，它可能导致很多倦怠、压力、挫败感或焦虑，所以我们需要做的是克服自己的完美主义。那么，如果这是一种根深蒂固的恐惧，我们该如何克服完美主义呢？

And, you know, perfection isn't achievable. It's it's just perfectionism is fear based. It's also really unrealistic. You know, it can lead to a lot of burnout or stress or frustration or anxiety, so and what we need to do is we need to overcome our own perfectionism. So how do we overcome perfectionism if it's this deep rooted fear?

其中一个最重要的关键是学会接纳不完美，将不完美视为一种美好的事物，而不是我们试图避免的东西，并看待那些看似巨大的任务，我们需要去追求，然后思考，我如何将其分解成更小的步骤？这样它就不是一个需要追求的巨大目标。我如何承担一些更可控的风险？然后审视我的风险，当我的恐惧开始出现时，开始应对这些恐惧。所以让我们谈谈一些策略，帮助你应对你可能有的这种完美主义。

Well, one of the biggest keys is to learning to embrace imperfection, To look at imperfection as a beautiful thing instead of something that we're trying to to avoid, and to look at something that that seems like this huge task that that we need to go after and go, how can I take this and make it smaller steps? So it's not this huge thing they need to go for. How can I take, you know, some more manageable risks? And then look at my risks, and as my fears start to come up, start to work through my fears as they come up. And so let's talk about some strategies to help you kind of help with this perfectionism that you might have.

我认为第一件非常重要的事情是转变你的心态，从追求完美转向关注进步。比如，我更关心进步而不是完美。你可以做的最大的转变之一是从完美主义心态转向进步心态。所以，与其追求一切完美，不如专注于进步和成长。你知道，比如，看待某件事并思考，我能从中学到什么？

The first thing that I think is really important is to shift your mindset around it, and to shift your mindset from from perfection to progress. Like, I care about progress more than perfection. One of the biggest shifts that you can make is moving from this perfectionist mindset to a progress mindset. So rather than aiming for everything to be perfect, focus on just progress and growth. You know, like, look at something and and think like, what can I learn from this?

下次我如何改进？当你开始接纳这种心态时，它会鼓励你采取行动，并在某种程度上失败，然后学习，好吧，如果我失败了，我会从中吸取教训。所以失败不一定是一件坏事，然后它会减少你对失败的恐惧。你知道吗？

How can I improve next time? And when you start embracing this mindset, it encourage you it encourages you to have action and to fail in some sort of way and to to learn like, okay. Well, if I do fail, then I'll learn from it. So failure isn't necessarily bad, and then it reduces this fear of failure that you have. You know?

比如说，如果你总是等到项目完美无缺才分享，要认识到一旦分享并获取反馈，反馈能改进它。所以如果你在想，嗯，那我应该尽早分享，因为这会帮助我更快进步。我关注的是进步，而非完美，长远来看这能带来更多成功。进步就是说，嘿，迈出下一步，一次一小步。

If you're like, for example, if you're waiting for, until a project is perfect before you share it, recognize that once you share it and get feedback, the feedback can improve it. And so if you're looking, you go, well, then I should probably share it as soon as I possibly can because that will help me progress more. And that's what I'm focusing on, is progress, not perfection, which leads to more success in the long run. And so progress just says, hey, take the next step. One small step at a time.

这就是动力的构建方式。这是第一点。第二点，开始承认你的恐惧。完美主义滋生于逃避，所以我们避免展现自己，因为我们害怕被拒绝、批评或以某种方式失败。我们越逃避这些失败，这些感觉就越控制我们。

That's really how momentum is built. That's the first thing. Second thing, start acknowledging your fears. Perfectionism thrives on avoidance, and so we avoid putting ourselves out there because we fear, once again, rejection or criticism or failure in some sort of way. The more that we avoid these failings, the more that those feelings actually have control over us.

所以是时候承认完美主义背后的恐惧了，坐下来问问自己，我到底在害怕什么？比如，我想行动却没有行动，我就是在害怕什么。就这么简单。如果你想行动却没行动，你就是在害怕什么。我到底在害怕什么？

And so it's time to acknowledge the fears that are behind your perfectionism, and sit there and ask yourself like, what am I really afraid of? Like, if I wanna take action and I'm not taking action, I'm afraid of something. It's that simple. You're afraid of something if you're if you're not taking action when you wanna be taking action. What am I really afraid of?

另一种自问方式是，我想保护自己免受什么？当你识别出恐惧，它们就失去力量，因为恐惧在脑中、未被写下和谈论时，是怪异模糊的，看似巨大。但写下来后，你会觉得，其实没那么糟。恐惧一旦被命名并直面，就变得不那么吓人，暴露在光下就失去对你的控制。所以我建议的一件事是保持恐惧日记。

Another way of asking yourself is, like, what am I trying to protect myself from? When you identify your fears, they lose power because fears, when they're in our brain and they're not written down and talked about, are weird and obscure and they seem like they're these huge things. But when you write them down, you're like, that's really not that bad. You know, fear becomes less intimidating when you name it and just confront it directly, and fear loses its grip on you when you expose it to the light. And so one of the things I recommend is keeping a fear journal.

每当某种恐惧出现并被你注意到，拿出日记本或手机备忘录，写下：我害怕这个。我认为这重要的原因不是要沉溺于恐惧，而是解码恐惧并开始注意自己的个人模式。这让恐惧出现时显得更小，更易管理。

You know, whenever some sort of fear pops up and you notice it, take your journal out, maybe a notes tab in your phone, and write down, I was afraid of this. And the reason why I think this is important is because it's not to to dwell on your fears. It's more than anything else to decode your fears and start to notice your own personal patterns. This makes your fears when they pop up seem smaller. They're more manageable.

它们往往是非理性的。你会开始看着它想，这太荒唐了，不会发生的。昨天我在为心态大学进行直播通话（这是我每周的团体辅导课程），我们谈到将恐惧演练到底，就是一步步走下去。每个人都发现，一旦我真正命名恐惧并尝试演练，问自己最坏能发生什么？

They're often irrational more than anything else. You start to look at me like, that's crazy. That's not gonna happen. Yesterday, I was running a live call for Mindset University, which is weekly group coaching sessions that I do, and we were talking about playing your fears out, like just going the next step and the next step and the next step and the next step. And every single person was like, once I actually named my fear and I tried to play my fear out and ask myself, what's the worst that could happen?

其实没那么糟，但在脑中时却显得非常严重。所以这是第二点。好了，第三点是练习自我同情。完美主义常由自我批评驱动。完美主义者对自己非常苛刻，认为任何不完美都是个人失败。

It wasn't that bad, but it when it was in my head, it seemed like it was so bad. And so that's the second thing. Alright, number three is to practice self compassion. Perfectionism is often driven by self criticism. Perfectionists can be really, really hard on themselves and believing that, you know, if it's anything short of flawless, then it's a personal failure.

当你这样想的时候，第一，这是极其有害的。第二，你会一生都在束缚自己。所以你的内心批评者听起来像是在帮助你，好像它真的在帮你做出更好的东西，但实际上它是在劫持你的自我价值，摧毁你的生活。试试这个：我建议给你的内心批评者起一个荒谬的名字，比如‘完美主义者帕姆’这样傻气的名字，然后每当完美主义者帕姆出现时，每次她出现，就说，‘嘿。’

And when you think like that, number one, it's super toxic. And number two, you're gonna be holding yourself back your entire life. And so your inner critic might sound like it's helping you, like it's actually helping you make some better stuff, but it's really hijacking your self worth, and it's destroying your life. And so try this. What I would recommend is giving your inner critic a ridiculous name, something silly that's like perfectionist Pam, and then when perfectionist Pam shows up, every time she shows up, just say, hey.

嘿，完美主义者帕姆。嘿，谢谢你试图保护我。我不需要你，我要回去勇敢地采取不完美的行动。因此，你的内心批评者看起来就不像是住在你脑袋里的邪恶魔鬼了。它就像是，哦，只是完美主义者帕姆而已。

Hey, perfectionist Pam. Hey, thanks for trying to protect me. I don't need you, and I'm just gonna get back to taking being brave and taking imperfect action. So therefore your inner critic doesn't seem like this this evil devil that lives inside of your head. It's like, oh, it's just perfectionist Pam.

没人怕她。所以，与其让这个内心批评者变得可怕，不如让它变得傻气，这样你就可以与那个内心批评者保持距离。尝试练习自我同情，用更多的善意和理解对待自己，尤其是在你犯错的时候。当你感到有追求完美的冲动时，问问自己，如果我爱的人来找我，告诉我他们正在处理这件事，我会不会也对这个人抱有不切实际的高标准，还是我会在那一刻给他们爱？然后你就会意识到，哦，我应该就在那一刻给自己爱。

Nobody's afraid of her. And so instead of making it scary, this inner critic, make it silly so that you can distance yourself from that inner critic. And so try practicing self compassion, treating yourself with more kindness and understanding, especially when you make mistakes. And when you feel this urge to be perfect, just ask yourself, like, if if somebody else that I love came over to me and and said that this is what they were dealing with, Would I hold this person to impossibly high standards as well, or would I just give them love in the moment? And then you'll realize, oh, I should just give myself love in the moment.

所以这是第三点。第四点是尽管恐惧也要采取行动。最终，战胜完美主义的最好方法是采取行动，尤其是在你害怕采取行动的时候。这可能感觉像是，你知道，发送一封还不完美的邮件。天哪。

So that's number three. Number four is to take action despite fear. Ultimately, the best way to beat perfectionism is to take action, especially when you're afraid to take action. And it might feel like, you know, it might be hitting send on an email that's not perfect yet. Oh my god.

分享你工作的草稿。天哪。或者申请一份你并非100%符合资格的工作。天哪。就像，总的来说就是采取行动。

Sharing a draft of your work. Oh my god. Or applying for a job that you're not a 100% qualified for. Oh my god. Like, just taking action in general.

采取行动会建立信心，帮助你意识到不完美并不是世界末日。它们不会杀死你，每次你在恐惧面前采取行动，都会削弱完美主义对你的控制。随着时间的推移，你会注意到你对完美的需求变得不再是为了避免恐惧。因为事实是：勇气不是没有恐惧。

And taking action just builds confidence and helps you realize that imperfections, they're not the end of the world. They're not gonna kill you, and every time that you take action in the face of fear, you weaken this grip that perfectionism has on you. And then over time, you'll notice that your your need for for for being perfect becomes less about avoiding fear. Because here's the truth. Courage isn't the absence of fear.

它是选择在恐惧存在的情况下继续前进。不是说，‘哦，我要等到恐惧消失。’而是说，‘不，我感受到了恐惧，但我还是要做。’每一次在恐惧中行动都会削弱你必须先完美的这个谎言。所以归根结底，你是在试图摆脱这种完美主义，因为完美主义可能感觉像是在追求卓越，但它往往只是一些恐惧穿着非常聪明的伪装，所以当你认识到这些驱动我们的恐惧，无论是害怕被评判、害怕失败、害怕脆弱，还是其他类似的恐惧，我们可以注意到它，并开始放松完美主义在我们生活中的控制，当你克服完美主义时，你会意识到你在接纳自己的不完美，从错误中学习，并专注于进步而不是追求无懈可击。

It's choosing to move forward in spite of that fear being there. It's not going, oh, I'm gonna wait until the fear is gone. It's going, no, I feel the fear, and I'm gonna do it anyways. Every act of doing it scares chips away at this lie that you have to be perfect first. So really what it comes down to is you trying to remove yourself from this perfectionism because perfectionism can feel like this pursuit of excellence, but it's often just some fear that's wearing a really clever disguise, and so when you recognize these fears that drive us, whether it's the fear of judgment or the fear of failure, the fear of vulnerability, or some other fear around that, we can notice it, and we can begin to loosen this hold that perfectionism has in our lives, and when you overcome perfectionism, you realize that you're embracing your imperfection, you learn from your mistakes, and you focus on progress rather than being flawless.

嗯，这就是自由的来源。这种自由来自于放下你的完美主义，然后你才能开始采取真正实际的行动和步骤，在生活中构建你想要的生活。这就是我今天这期节目为你准备的内容。如果你喜欢这期节目，请在Instagram故事中分享它，并在@RobDialjr（r o b d I a l j r）标记我。

Well, that's where freedom comes from. That freedom comes from letting go of your perfectionism, and then you can start taking real actual action and steps forward in your life to build a life that you want. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on the Instagram stories. Tag me in at Rob Dial junior, r o b d I a l j r.

那么，和往常一样，我将以每期节目结束时的同一句话来告别你。请将让他人的一天变得更美好作为你的使命。我很感激你，并希望你拥有美好的一天。

And, with that, I'm gonna leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make someone else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.